Given the events of the past year, it's become necessary for me to become the keeper of all things household, including the garden. Ever since I can remember, I have detested the idea of weeding and watering, pampering and pruning. To me, that has always been the man's work. Call it sexist, but I believe that a woman should take care of the majority of the inside chores - cooking, laundry, cleaning, tending to the kids. The man, on the other hand, did all the "dirty jobs" - fixing broken doors, cars, taking out the garbage, and yard work. My - how my views have changed.

I used to complain that "male chores" paled in comparison to "female chores." I mean really, how often does one need to water? How quickly can weeds grow once their roots are swiftly yanked out of the ground? And is mowing the lawn really that tough? HA! Yes, tending the yard may be a once or twice a week event, but it's no piece of cake. It's labor intensive, and for those who know me well, manual labor is not my thing. Not only that, I'm lacking the trait that most gardeners are born with - a green thumb. Funny how the daughter of a man who can grow lettuce in the middle of Las Vegas can find gardening such a mystery.

So as I looked at the not-so-green-greenery that was beginning to take over the back yard, I decided it was time that I learned how to prune the night blooming jasmine that was no longer in bloom. Granted, I have never trimmed anything more substantial than a rose tree, I figured that my limited knowledge would suffice in helping me reach my desired goal - a yard that looked more green than brown. With shears in hand, I attacked the bush that once produced the fragrant flowers for which it was named.

"A piece of cake," I thought as I slowly trimmed away the dried up blooms. Five minutes. Ten minutes. Fifteen minutes later, there I was, still trimming away. Geez. This plant wasn't even 3 feet tall. What was taking so long? Perhaps I was using the wrong tools. Perhaps I was being a little ginger in my approach. After all, I didn't want to kill the poor thing by chopping at anything that got in the way. My arms started to ache. The sun was beating down on my head. I started to drift into the "this isn't my job" mode that contributed to my lack of knowledge of the outdoors. So I turned to the philosophical and found a way to relate the yard work to my life.

Night blooming jasmine are characterized by the beautiful scent it gives off in the evening. The dainty white flowers exude a fragrance that is both calming and intense. Tended to correctly, the plant should bloom continuously. However, if not regularly tended to, it becomes an overgrown, unfragrant mess. My once beautiful vine was now dotted with brown blooms that more resembled weeds. So I started hacking away at the dead stuff to give life to the new growth struggling to get out.

Sometimes life throws us situations that seem impossible to survive. Some of us are strong enough deal with these trials head-on. Do what needs to be done to get to the next step and move on. More often than not, especially for me, it's easier to ignore and accommodate. Change my thoughts and beliefs to make the situation tolerable and hope that I can deal with it. However, in doing so, I've failed to tend my garden. I've let it grow into an intolerable mess. And just as it seemed to take forever to trim away the dead blooms from the plant, so will it be a while to remove the weeds that are suffocating the life longing to get out.

Gardening, therefore, is not such a bad thing. It is, in fact, extremely liberating. It's no wonder my dad used to immerse his self into tending the roses. The end result was always, and still is, so beautiful. I'm looking forward to being surrounded by the fragrance of the night blooming jasmine that will soon waft through the evening air. It will remind me of the beauty yet to come.