Tuesday, January 06, 2009

in a different life
in a different life,
your words would flow next to mine
with the same scheme,
with a smooth rhyme,
your lyrics and decadence
proclaiming my relevance to their
existence.

in a different life
your eloquence would mix
with my broken syntax,
like needles on wax
and expose the allusions
of romances timed perfectly
in our compositions.

in a different life,
these hollowed out bullets
of letters and punctuation
wouldn't cause death but creation -
the manifestation
of two individually beautiful
fragments run-on
but given meaning by a semi-colon.

in a different life,
in a different atmosphere
where our paralleled bodies would interweave,
histories would matter less
than the volumes of stories bound in sheathes
like swords or sharp quills,
the thrills of the flirtation
of our energies
more addictive than the initial butterflies
or reality tv.

in a different life,
where you write too much,
and my hand gets fatigued,
where I speak in mixed metaphors
and indulgent discretion,
you are the footnotes of expert translation,
the solemn ear to my confession.
but in that different life,
there would be no sins for which to atone,
or reasons for unrequited feelings
to be left silent and alone.
in that different life,
the listed long complications screaming resolutely
would be laughed at and paid no mind
for their futility.

A different life isn't real,
but you are. and I am.
and the rhythms and literary expanses
and spoken diatribes of love, life, and general
dissatisfaction of anyone else -
are real.
but the more we confide and the more we delve,
the more we can't get over ourselves.

in this life,
we are just bad love poetry repeated
with images of different faces,
same verbs but different subjects -
and the same us
refusing to overcome the reasons
that we swim aimlessly in a sea of words
with no cohesion.

Ulam cooked @ 1:22 AM

 0 of the headscratch variety

Monday, January 05, 2009

DAYAMN.... 2 months??
It's 2009!!! Nothing new.

Just wanted to post these thoughts from the Vegas trip in December..
Lots of coincidentals that weekend.. that basically reminded me that I was where I was supposed to be that weekend. Not sure why. Not sure why it's even an issue. I guess, maybe, I second guessed the purpose of being there that weekend once all the peeps started falling off the list and weren't able to go.. but it wasn't.

It was great hanging out with Mon and having that hella long ass late ass heart to heart that we haven't had in a few years. It was great having fun with Thy. It was great hanging out with Estee and Dior.. and knowing that she had a fun weekend! =) And it was great meeting my newest nephew: Karisio and seeing Ange and her family.

So, the coincidentals that fit the rest of my the previous months of "strange energy".

1) The first day we got there, the wind was going CRAZY! It wasn't so cold, but the wind-chill factor was nuts. So, at some point we were able to see tumbleweed roll by in front of our car. Then, the wind was so thick that it was blowing the wind on the ground and I thought.. "hmm, that looks like the snow when it's storming up in the mountains." Then, the day we left, as many of us have seen already, it was SNOWING!

2) At one point in the weekend, we went to Popeye's to buy Estee's bro some food (like 3 hours AFTER we left the house). I wanted to get Macaroni and Cheese for a side, but they didn't have any. Then, on Monday, at Ange's place, there was Mac and Cheese. Yeah, silly. But really, Mac and Cheese don't exist in my life all too often.

3) Sunday night in Vegas with another day to recover. What did we do? Yup. Sat in front of the computer and looked up old school videos on YouTube. We went from old school to slow jams to 80's cheese to the genius-years of Michael Jackson. I said I wish I could go to a show of MJ's if it was the 1980s version of him. On the way back from Summerlin, we heard on the radio that MJ was thinking of going on tour again.

4) Actually, on the same trip back (and maybe to Summerlin), they were talking about TLC and T-Boz. They were part of the youtube night. (Red Light Special, Creep... hmm.) And at some point we were also listening to Franzen from KMEL fame. Nothing really coincidental except that it was a very high school memory type weekend and listening to KMEL was essential during that time.

5)Finally, there was the Brady Bunch. What? Yes. Because I was saying that it was my 13th birthday - my introduction to adolescence and graduation from puberty, I referenced the Brady Bunch story when Peter's voice started to crack. Remember the song.. "When it's time to change.. you got to re-arrange"? So, at Summerlin, Ange and family were watching a DVD of random Brady Bunch episodes.

Silly strange fun.

I realized they wouldn't have happened if I didn't go to Summerlin. I guess, it's simple. Anytime spent laughing, sharing, talking, and partaking in happiness with family (and friends) is worthwhile!

Ulam cooked @ 9:32 PM

 0 of the headscratch variety